Not quite palpitations. I’ve had some chest pain the last couple days, felt like a knife in the center of my chest to be exact, but it wasn’t too bad. This morning I woke up and not only was it significantly worse my chest was constricted like there was a heavy band wrapped around it and my heartbeat felt wrong, I don’t really know how to describe it other than kind of “liquidy.” Needless to say I went to the hospital and walked into the emergency room around noon. It’s 11pm now and I just got home a little bit ago.

Because of a history of weak spots on my lungs and a collapse that occurred as a result of one they suspected a tear in the lung and X-rayed my chest before attaching a bunch of leads to me. No holes in the lung but my heartbeat was irregular. Next up came smearing goo on my chest and doing an ultrasound to look at my heart. Definitely a problem. More looking with the ultrasound and they ordered up some more bloodwork. Oh boy, more needles.

On the plus side I know I’m set on vitamins for a while, they gave me several vitamin shots, made me eat a lunch they prepared, made me eat another lunch a couple hours later that came right back up, made me eat dinner a couple hours later, and made me eat a second light dinner that I barely kept down.

So why the vitamins and forcefeeding? The bloodwork showed evidence of malnutritions which isn’t exactly a surprise as I’ve only been eating one meal a day, sometimes less. The weird heartbeat was a result of the malnutrition, my body getting sustenance from the only place it can, itself and compounding the existing damage. The damage usn’t irreparable but does require eating more often and making sure it’s nutritious. I now have to be afraid that not being able to eat because of stress and financial issues, may fuck up my heart more than it already was from oral abscesses spreading through the bloodstream and the pressure the collapsed lung and subsequent leaks from my lungs.